On my first free weekend at the academy, I decide I need a break from that place. My classmates are ok, but the unstructured environment is starting to get to me. I do my best to go with the flow, but that Erkturd (Do we really call him a pile of shit???) is a bit daft. The gnome does his best to try to keep him out of trouble, however, I feel we may all be doomed in the end. As I approach the gatehouse, I ask Jerry, the gatekeeper for the weekend evening shifts, where some of the best bars are. He mentions that though the best pub is in the Fire District, first years are discouraged from going there alone as it can be a bit “rough”. He mentions Elvaranda’s Brewhouse and Bakery in the Water District.

After rounding the last corner to the brewhouse and bakery, I notice the smell of smoked meats. My mouth waters as I enter. The first thing I notice is that there is no bread. After approaching the bar, I find that Elvaranda is no brewer of ales, though her liquor selection is phenomenal. I spend a few silver, and order a tray of meats and a small selection (mini shot glasses) of liquors to try out for my next time back.

As I devour my meats, and imbibe the beverage, a group comes in loudly exclaiming how wonderful the circus they just left was. I perk up since the circus was always a big deal when I was a child. After all, it was the best time to pick pockets as it is held in a crowded, cramped area. I listen for a few minutes more to determine the location, and slink out to find the circus. Maybe I can make a little coin to pay for dinner.

I put my coin purse out of sight inside my jerkin, and make my way to the circus. Upon my approach, I join a large tight crowd, inching towards the tent. I manage to lift a few silver here and there, a bit more than enough to cover my dinner and drinks for the night. Moments before I get to the entrance, a large, burly goliath steps through, closes the flaps, and bellows “Last show for the night is full. Come back tomorrow to see the spectacle.”

Dejected, I turn away to go back to Elvaranda’s once more. Suddenly, I hear a pained roar of an animal I could not identify. I push my way through the crowd and come around the corner to see 3 circus workers torturing an ape. Never have I heard a more tortured soul. Even though I want to help this poor creature, my duty to the college stays my hand. I hide to observe the exchange between the ape, human male, female dwarf, and goblin who’s race I cannot determine.

The human forces a pointed stick into the ape’s back saying “’Orace ya dumb oaf, next time do as ye’re told.” Suddenly, the ape’s primal instinct to defend himself kicks in. He grabs the stick, pulling the human into the bars, knocking the man unconscious. The dwarf and goblin are enraged by this, and start throwing rocks at him. “Horace, how dare you attack us. What’s gotten into you filthy beast?”

Finally, I can take no more. I approach from the shadows and ask what this creature has done to deserve this treatment. The goblin speaks some gibberish at me and pulls a knife on me and goes to charge. As I go to sidestep, a rock flies from out of nowhere knocking it out cold. I pick up the knife and menacingly approach the dwarf and ask once more what the creature has done to deserve this treatment.

As she looks around, and backs up towards Horace’s enclosure, his arm flies out and he smears a pile of his own shit on her head. Immediately, I burst into laughter and the dwarf grabs her handaxe ready for battle. She takes a swing at Horace’s outstretched arm, missing only because of the fecal matter falling into her face. I step in, swiping at her arm and giving her a small cut down the side. She spins around and swipes at me, hitting me with the flat of the blade on my head. Stunned, I fall to the ground, trying to recover from the hard hit. This dwarven bitch is tougher than she looks. As she approaches, I decide to cast my sandstorm version of fog cloud to blind her to my movements as I recover.

Suddenly I hear the gasp and shock of hundreds of people. Not thinking clearly, my sandstorm accidentally stirred up a rather large dust cloud inside the big tent as well as in my immediate area. I use my immediate cover to roll out of the way and try to regain my bearings. Horace at this point decides to throw more excrement at the dwarf lady. She sounds enraged, and begins to hack at the wooden poles to his enclosure to get at him. As the bars become brittle and break, she manages to get in one good hit on Horace, leaving a large gash in his side. He roars in rage, and with the axe imbedded in his side, thrusts her out, impaling her leg on one of the broken bars.

At this point, I release my tentative hold on the sandstorm and approach her. I pick up one of the broken bars and bash her head in over and over until she is unconscious and bleeding. Deciding leaving her in this position could be unwise, I wrap her leg with a strip of her clothing to stop the bleeding. I’m no healer, but previous military experience at least taught me how do basic tourniquet to reduce/stop the bleeding. With that done, I decide to approach Horace.

I’ve always had a good rapport with beasts, and with a few gestures, and using a calm voice, I’m able to let him know that I’m here to help. We slowly crawl out of the enclosure and Horace collapses to the ground. I cut the shirt from the human, remove the axe from Horace’s side, and create another tourniquet/bandage around his side. With the blood stymied, I decide a hasty retreat is in order. To decrease suspicion, I throw several clumps of Horace’s excrement in the other’s direction, as well as a few large stones. We also smear a blood trail down the back alleyways and pathways until we reach the lake. From there, I clean his wounds further, and we walk up the coast under the cover of darkness, and in the water until we get to a paved area. Slowly, we make our way down more alleyways until we reach the path back to the college. At this point, I know I can’t leave Horace alone, though I’m unsure what the ruling on pets is. I hide him back in an alley and have him rest while I find a shop still open.

Luckily, this town doesn’t ever seem to sleep, and finding a shop was easy. I buy a small pouch and belt, real bandages, and cloth with a brown and green splotchy pattern. After paying the clerk, I realize that I’m back to where I started when leaving the college.

Horace is looking better now than he was, and is instantly alert when I come down the alley. I approach slowly, and calmly until he catches my scent and relaxes. I do my best to communicate that he will have to play a little “dress up” before we can go, though he looks rightly confused. I remove the human’s shirt from his wound, and he winces as the dried blood peels off. The bleeding comes back, though much slower than before. I apply the fresh bandages, and give him a good couple of wrap arounds with the bandages. With the cloth, I wrap it around his neck, and tie it in the front. Next, I loop the belt over one shoulder, letting it hang on his side. Seeing his confusion, I pick up several stones and place them in his pouch. I then pull one out and throw it at a rat lurking further down the alley. I barely nick it in the leg. As it begins to hobble away, I suddenly see the rat fly nearly 30 feet out into the street. Turning to Horace, I see the pouch is open and a toothy grin on his face. I think we will be great friends. Horace picks up a few more stones and looks for rats in the alley. I’m able to convince him to save his rocks in his pouch since I’m worried about him reopening his wounds.

At this point, I think it is safe to go back to the college. Upon reaching the gate, Jerry gives me a funny look. “Do I want to know where the ape came from?” he asks. “What ape,” I respond. “This is my pal Horace. He’ll be bunking with me for a while.” Jerry laughs and points at a group of buildings near the housing unit. “Register your ‘pal’ with the recruitment office before the weekend is up or it’s your ass” he says.

With that, I meet back up with my group in our bunk for the night.